Wednesday 29 October 2014

October 28th A Guest Blog By Minnie

I have been allowed to write a Guest Blog about my enforced break at the Beach. Please don't divulge this, but just between you and me, my ultimate plan is to take over this Blog and entertain you everyday, with my life observations. However that may be a tad difficult when the blog is called 'Irene Loves Elephants'.  Come on! Really!!  I think it should have been called 'Irene Adores and Idolises Minnie' but that could be a while down the track. However watch this space - I am not just a pretty face (insert maniacal woof woofs).

Back to the 'holiday'.  I really don't know why they persist in forcing me to accompany them on these breaks. I have a perfectly good Doggy motel I can go to. Admirers and Suitors aplenty are there. But oh no. Because the house they rent allows pets - they insist that I attend. You may think I am strange, but the idea of running with sand between my paws is not a turn on. As to going into Ocean water - the thought of sand up in my girlie bits does not appeal and who wants to be on display with wet hair. You don't know what stud may come along with his Master, and I really do like to look my best at all times.

To rub salt into my wounds, look at these signs.  This one was at the very end of the beach, where these birds were just begging to be chased. But oh no. I was on a lead and no way would they ignore the sign and allow me down there. I was actually mortified when I heard them comment that they thought this was a good idea for the preservation of these birds. What about the preservation of my chasing instinct. What about me? 



The next day we went to indulge in some Fish and Chips for lunch. Thank God I thought. We are escaping all of this sand and ocean. I rubbed my perfectly manicured paws together, when I heard we would eat lunch in a Park. Can you imagine my reaction. Grass, Grass and more Grass. The sand and the ocean were across the road, but this was real grass. Oh I was in Pee Heaven I tell you. Then I saw this.


Look at No. 2.  Exercised! Exercised!  It's only sand so who gives a toss about going down there. I am trim, taut and terrific (do you know I have weighed exactly the same weight since reaching adult hood - not bad for an old girl is it. Maybe I should pass some of my tips on to Her. I notice a little poundage there I tell you!!).

Finally back to the home. Where we stayed and He watched movies and She read books. They would make their way down the path each day and drink their coffees overlooking the beach. They would be twittering away about nothing, but I stayed ever vigilant. I am after all a Guard Dog Supreme.


Each day would end the same. Me perched here, thinking when are you coming to bed? Did they take any notice of me - well what do you think?


Next time I am going to stamp my little paws and insist I be taken to my Doggy Motel. They may come away feeling relaxed and rested, but what about me? What About Me? I tell you , it was such a pleasure to return home to my own couch, my outlook on the neighbourhood, and the bed I let them share with me.

Until next time. Woof Woof!!

2 comments:

  1. Ooooh that made for a great story about your holiday with 'them'. Only thing is I'm not sure whether to feel sad for you and happy for them. Sometimes it's a bleedin dog's life aint it. But I'll tell you what, they probably chose a place that they could include you too so that they could show you off, yes, you are totally worth it even if the wind got in your eyes and the sand stuck to your nether places and the big salty bath was too big and ruined your beautifully styled hair cut. Yes the beach is the place to pick up studs. I think you need to take your hair stylist with you next time. Suggest that to them and see what they think, although I think they would be very choosy when it comes to studs - he'd have to come up to 100% their expectations. Yes, I can see you might take over their blog and you could entertain us with your observations on their life eh?!
    D.

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  2. Minnie here, thanks D. She is just about apopleptic from too much red wine to say thanks. I appreciate your words of wisdom thank you. WOOF WOOF I will rule the world!!

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